We had the opportunity to attend a Dutch wedding this weekend, although to be perfectly accurate we actually attended a church service to commemorate the wedding of a young couple. I think for them it was the actual wedding, but as far as the state is concerned, the wedding took place the day before at the local courthouse or town hall. Like so many countries now the official marriages are conducted as civil ceremonies.
In many ways the ceremony was like an American wedding and in some ways it diverged. I will share how it was different. The first thing I noticed was that there were no groomsmen at all, not even a best man. The wedding procession began with four bridesmaids coming down the aisle in pairs to beautiful classical music. Behind them were the bride and groom walking together. Apparently father's do not give the bride away in Holland. The wedding party then sat down in the chairs in the front row. The wedding couple would periodically stand and sit throughout the ceremony.
The guests were welcomed, then we all sang a song together. In many ways the service was like a regular church service with prayers and the singing of hymns with scriptures read and a short sermon. There was, of course, the difference in the theme which was love and marriage and there was the exchange of vows and rings in the midst of it. Oh, yea, there was some kissing too. There isn't usually too much of that in the middle of ordinary church services. :-)
The bride was born in the Netherlands to Dutch parents, but they immigrated to England when she was five years old. She is naturally fluent in English. To accommodate some of her international guests - they came from Serbia, the Ukraine, America, Canada, England and Germany/Austria - they had an English translator for the service and the program came in both languages as well.
Here is the wedding ceremony and vows:
"We have come together as God's people to witness Dave and Johanna's marriage in God's presence and to ask for His blessing with them and for them. The church of Jesus Christ professes that marriage is a God-given opportunity: a life-long companionship between two people, in which they are given the chance to make each other happy, serve each other, and give each other love and loyalty, in good times and bad times.
When a man and woman make this commitment to each other in the name of the Lord, they promise together that they want to belong to each other completely in love and faithfully stand at each other's side in all situations. Together they shall search for God's will in their life; together they shall carry out their task and care for their family. Together they shall accept their roles in society as man and woman, as people on their way to God's planned future. Their unity with each other is a symbol of the unity between Christ and the Church.
Therefore, bride and groom, you shall love each other like Christ loved his Church. As Christ gave Himself to His Church, so you shall serve each other, guide and help each other in wisdom, and treat each other with patience and forgiveness.
You shall share everything with each other, without denying the other their freedom. In all circumstances, you shall stand at each other's side without dominating the other or following the other blindly. You shall form a close companionship, but at the same time you should realize that your family is part of a bigger picture. Therefore you shall be open to responsibilities outside your own home.
You shall carry out your tasks and help each other do this, but you should also make sure that rest and joy have their
place and that life is experienced as a gift. In this way, you shall encourage and keep each other in the service of the Lord, who has joined Himself with us and called us to the great wedding feast.
Vows:
I (name), promise you, (name)
To love you and be faithful to you,
In good time and bad times,
For richer , for poorer,
In sicknes and in health,
So long as we both shall live.
As a sign of my love for you, I give you this ring."
Then the pastor blessed the couple and what was unique to me was that among many things, she also blessed their sexuality together. The closest I had ever heard in America was a pastor who prays for the people he marries to be filled with passion - for life, for love, for each other.
The couple was presented to the church as man and woman - there is no Dutch word for husband and wife. He is now her man and she is now his woman. Everyone clapped with joy for them. We sang another song together, had another prayer and blessing, then sang together once more before the bride and groom proceeded from the church.
We met in the church hall for the reception where several kinds of cakes were served including "wedding cake" which is the decorated kind.
The couple cut the wedding cake while photos were taken, then the buffet was open. After eating their cake, the bridal couple and their parents formed a receiving line so the guests could offer their good wishes and love.
An interesting thing the bridesmaids did at the reception was to pass out colorful pieces of paper to each guest to write something to David and Johanna and as we left the reception our photo was taken. These photos and notes would then be put together to form a guest book for the new couple.
The bride and groom have both worked for TWR as salaried employees, but they will soon begin fund-raising to return as missionaries. We have come to know the bride, Johanna, over the past several months as she has been working out of our offices while she and David planned their wedding and future life together. Though they are both Dutch, they will likely be working in Austria because that is where their previous jobs were located.
We had the opportunity to attend a Dutch wedding this weekend, although to be perfectly accurate we actually attended a church service to commemorate the wedding of a young couple. I think for them it was the actual wedding, but as far as the state is concerned, the wedding took place the day before at the local courthouse or town hall. Like so many countries now the official marriages are conducted as civil ceremonies.
In many ways the ceremony was like an American wedding and in some ways it diverged. I will share how it was different. The first thing I noticed was that there were no groomsmen at all, not even a best man. The wedding procession began with four bridesmaids coming down the aisle in pairs to beautiful classical music. Behind them were the bride and groom walking together. Apparently father's do not give the bride away in Holland. The wedding party then sat down in the chairs in the front row. The wedding couple would periodically stand and sit throughout the ceremony.
The guests were welcomed, then we all sang a song together. In many ways the service was like a regular church service with prayers and the singing of hymns with scriptures read and a short sermon. There was, of course, the difference in the theme which was love and marriage and there was the exchange of vows and rings in the midst of it. Oh, yea, there was some kissing too. There isn't usually too much of that in the middle of ordinary church services. :-)
The bride was born in the Netherlands to Dutch parents, but they immigrated to England when she was five years old. She is naturally fluent in English. To accommodate some of her international guests - they came from Serbia, the Ukraine, America, Canada, England and Germany/Austria - they had an English translator for the service and the program came in both languages as well.
Here is the wedding ceremony and vows:
"We have come together as God's people to witness Dave and Johanna's marriage in God's presence and to ask for His blessing with them and for them. The church of Jesus Christ professes that marriage is a God-given opportunity: a life-long companionship between two people, in which they are given the chance to make each other happy, serve each other, and give each other love and loyalty, in good times and bad times.
When a man and woman make this commitment to each other in the name of the Lord, they promise together that they want to belong to each other completely in love and faithfully stand at each other's side in all situations. Together they shall search for God's will in their life; together they shall carry out their task and care for their family. Together they shall accept their roles in society as man and woman, as people on their way to God's planned future. Their unity with each other is a symbol of the unity between Christ and the Church.
Therefore, bride and groom, you shall love each other like Christ loved his Church. As Christ gave Himself to His Church, so you shall serve each other, guide and help each other in wisdom, and treat each other with patience and forgiveness.
You shall share everything with each other, without denying the other their freedom. In all circumstances, you shall stand at each other's side without dominating the other or following the other blindly. You shall form a close companionship, but at the same time you should realize that your family is part of a bigger picture. Therefore you shall be open to responsibilities outside your own home.
You shall carry out your tasks and help each other do this, but you should also make sure that rest and joy have their
place and that life is experienced as a gift. In this way, you shall encourage and keep each other in the service of the Lord, who has joined Himself with us and called us to the great wedding feast.
Vows:
I (name), promise you, (name)
To love you and be faithful to you,
In good time and bad times,
For richer , for poorer,
In sicknes and in health,
So long as we both shall live.
As a sign of my love for you, I give you this ring."
Then the pastor blessed the couple and what was unique to me was that among many things, she also blessed their sexuality together. The closest I had ever heard in America was a pastor who prays for the people he marries to be filled with passion - for life, for love, for each other.
The couple was presented to the church as man and woman - there is no Dutch word for husband and wife. He is now her man and she is now his woman. Everyone clapped with joy for them. We sang another song together, had another prayer and blessing, then sang together once more before the bride and groom proceeded from the church.
We met in the church hall for the reception where several kinds of cakes were served including "wedding cake" which is the decorated kind.
The couple cut the wedding cake while photos were taken, then the buffet was open. After eating their cake, the bridal couple and their parents formed a receiving line so the guests could offer their good wishes and love.
An interesting thing the bridesmaids did at the reception was to pass out colorful pieces of paper to each guest to write something to David and Johanna and as we left the reception our photo was taken. These photos and notes would then be put together to form a guest book for the new couple.
The bride and groom have both worked for TWR as salaried employees, but they will soon begin fund-raising to return as missionaries. We have come to know the bride, Johanna, over the past several months as she has been working out of our offices while she and David planned their wedding and future life together. Though they are both Dutch, they will likely be working in Austria because that is where their previous jobs were located.
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